Worst Story Ever
by snapeathy
Summary: Mauraders Era!Snape is turned into a vampire! Can he and fellow monster, Remus Lupin, find comfort in the arms of each other? Read and find out! SS/RL
1. Chapter 1

AN: This is an experiment in self-mocking fanfiction ridiculousness.

PS: Every other paragraph is written by my Beta and I in turns. As we will be going through this quickly there will likely be a number of typos we hope you can forgive. Hope you like. :)

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><p>The majority of Snape's life was nothing but a string of failures, humiliations, and disappointments. He was poor, forced to wear nothing but hand-me-downs, half of which were from his mother, and was horribly skinny and unkempt. He was born as an outcast, dismissed and abused by everyone he knew with one exception. Lily, the only other gifted human being he knew besides his uncaring mother, had shown him kindness in a cruel world, but her naiveté and optimism kept her at odds with the boy who knew far too much of the evils of the world to ever be so easily deceived. Despite all this, however, he still had something in his future which had given him hope, somewhere he could go to finally find others like himself, somewhere he could belong. Somewhere called Hogwarts, but as his luck would have it, this place proved to be the greatest disappointment of all.<p>

He was forced into classes with complete dunderheads who knew so little of potions and hexes it was any wonder that they had ever been allowed within the walls of the school in the first place. His only consultation was that he had been placed in Slytherin house, but even that mild joy fled quickly when he discovered that he would still be forced into class rooms with children from the other houses. Most were just generic fools, struggling with magic and just growing into their young, cruel minds. But none, none at all compared to the small troupe of bumbling Gryffindor who pulled upon themselves the weighty task of making his every day more miserable than the last.

He was still an outcast, and those four red and gold stripped morons made sure to remind him of it. Although he knew at least a dozen ways to hex them into oblivion, the death or disembowelment of another student would surely mean expulsion, and even though school was unpleasant, it was still a far cry better than being at home. Here, he was free to study and progress in his art. Here he could become someone of note, someone worth respecting and fearing. Until then, he would just have to get by. Though why his brain hadn't won him the praise of his peers was beyond him.

He suffered through years of torment from the other students, though many times it was difficult to not just poison those four boys who called themselves Marauders and finally be free of their idiocy and cruelness. He knew that putting up with them was nothing more than a way to prove that he truly was superior to them, even if he was the only one who knew it. He did his best until his sixth year of school when their little games had gone too far and Snape had almost died in the secret tunnels beneath the whomping willow. Not only had it been a deliberate attempt on his life by one Sirius Black, but he had gotten away with it. The injustice was too much. Snape, who had remained passive for so long could not allow the boys to continue their torments.

Seventh year was going to be different. He had finally gotten the proof he needed, proof that the sickly Lupin was indeed a werewolf as he had known all along, but that interfering idiot, Dumbledore had made his swear it to secrecy. That didn't mean, however, that he couldn't reveal the Marauder's secrets in some other way. If say, a few pictures of the four boys breaking curfew on a full moon _happened_ to find their way into the wrong hands, it wouldn't be his fault if said third party spilled the beans. No, of course it wouldn't, and no one would have any proof he had taken the snapshots in the first place.

So it was on the night of a beautiful full moon that he crept out of his dormitory with a camera in hand and followed the horrible boys into the depths of the forbidden forest. He kept his wand aloft, its tip glowing dimly in the gloom. He could hear the 'marauders' bumbling about in the brush, snapping twigs and disturbing sleeping birds. He readied his camera and moved with stealth closer to the sounds.

In the quiet of the night, Severus did his best to remain silent, but the summer had left the trees dry and brittle, and the forest floor was littered with old twigs. Suddenly, the voices ahead of him were gone, replaced by the sounds of running and the exited barking of some random stray dog. He stood more upright to see where the group had disappeared to, but saw only a glimpse of a buck running from the feral canine before they dashed off into the trees away from him. To his dismay, there was no sign of the group he had been trailing after, but he knew they couldn't be too far, so he continued his pursuit, trying to find any clue to show him where the others had gone. Sadly, it wasn't long before Severus realized he was completely lost.

He decided to count his losses for the night, or at least when it came to the forest. He would try and make his way back to school and wait for the boys to return to campus, he could always catch them then. However, lost was still lost and he could not tell what direction the school was even in. He turned in slow circles until one direction looked as good as another and started back to where he hoped he would find those familiar walls.

Hours passed and he still hadn't seen anything that looked familiar. By that time has was worn and tired, his feet aching from the long trek and constantly second guessing on which path to take, and the strange sounds seemed to follow him through the winding trees. Twigs snapped on both sides of him, in front of him, and behind him as though he were surrounded by some invisible menace. Then, all at once, the forest was bright with the sun's light forcing him to shield his night sensitive eyes. He could see the end of the trees now and the small disheveled shack just beyond, but for the life of him he couldn't remember how he got there. Had he fallen asleep and somehow kept on walking? If that were the case, it was nothing short of a miracle that he managed to find his way back to the castle grounds without being harmed.

With day time already come, he knew that he had somehow even missed his chance of intercepting the Marauders at the school gate. He stumbled wearily down to the Slytherin dorms, set aside his camera and quickly fell asleep, hoping to get in a hour or so worth of real sleep before breakfast.


	2. Chapter 2

When he awoke, his head was pounding, his mouth was dry, and what light could make it through the underwater windows irritated his eyes. He presumed the feeling was similar to how one would feel on a hangover after a particularly entertaining evening, though last night had been anything but fun. Feeling a bit dizzy, Severus sat up slowly and rubbed his head. Considering all him symptoms, he decided he must simply be dehydrated, so, finding his footing surprisingly well, he meandered through the dormitories and into the gentlemen's loo.

He didn't see any other students about, which suited him well enough, but probably meant that they were already at breakfast. He stood before one of the many bathroom sinks and splashed water over his face before cupping his hands under the steady stream of water and drinking. Handful after handful passed his throat, but his thirst could not be quenched. He wiped a hand over his mouth and closed his eyes. His head still hurt, and now his belly did too. It was not shaping up to be a good day.

In a vague sort of daze, Severus slowly made his way back to his bed and changed before slowly treading up the stairs and down the cold stone hallways. The chill of the floor against his feet, which he only then realized were still bare, was a comfort to his aching body, but the comfort didn't last long. When he arrived at the great hall, he found it mostly empty save for a few straggling students and a smattering of spirits floating aimlessly about. He had slept longer than he thought, but despite his studious nature, he wasn't feeling up to going to any classes before he'd gotten something to eat.

Bite after bite he ate, sampling pumpkin pasties, treacle tarts, bacon, eggs, but they were all rubbish and made his aching stomach only feel worse. He was so hungry, and no matter what food he tried the famished feeling that was gnawing away at him would not be satisfied. With disgust he pushed the remainder of his food away and stood, looking around the room at the remnant of the breakfast feast, hoping that perhaps something from one of the other tables might satiate his hunger.

The last of the remaining students hurriedly finishing up their breakfasts watched him curiously as he abandoned his house table in further search for food, but he took no notice of them. He grabbed an empty flask and filled it with some orange juice thinking he might still be thirsty, but though it satisfied better than anything else so far it still wasn't what he wanted. He picked up a cold sausage from a nearby platter and sank his teeth into its soft skin, his gums tingling in response to the rich juices emanating from the wound. The texture of the meat was like rubber in his mouth, but the liquids that sprang forth from it were satisfying. One after another until the plate was empty, he leached onto the greasy bangers and sucked them dry.

"Bloody hell, Snivilous." The voice came from behind him and immediately summoned up a murderous rage from deep within. "Here you are, late for breakfast, half dressed and sucking on pilfered sausages." Sirius Black's mocking tone made him reach for his wand. "You just make this too easy."

He carefully turned around, meat in one hand, wand in the other, to look at Sirius, and to his surprise, Lupin, who stood reluctantly beside his friend looking at anything but the object of Sirius' ridicule. "You should be in class by now, Black. Why the late start? You two stay up shagging too long last night? Really Lupin, I thought you had better taste than that."

Sirius' cocky smirk instantly disappeared and he struck out at the smaller boy. Too angry to even think about drawing his wand, his fist hit Snape square on the nose resulting in a loud snapping sound and a fair amount of fresh blood.

Snape would have crumpled to the floor, he should have at least considered it, but instead as the wash of warm blood trailed down his face and the back of his throat all he could think was that this, **this**, was exactly what he had been craving. Logic and good taste aside, he dropped his wand and the banger and cupped his hands to his face, catching the dripping blood and lapping it up. Lost in his own world of crimson deliciousness, Snape completely forgot about the other boy still poised to fight him.

Sirius didn't even notice what Snape was doing, only that he was cupping his broken nose. He grasped Snape by the arm to pull him up, ready to strike him again, but the threat of his food being taken away from him caused Severus to react a bit more violently than usual.

In the blink of an eye, Snape was on top of Black, biting down hard on the soft skin of Sirius' neck with Sirius too stunned to react properly. Fortunately for Black, Lupin, though drained from the previous night's transformation, was still sharp as a tack and levicorpised Snape off of him and into the air, a trail of green magic leading from Snape's ankle back to Lupin's wand, before the boy's flat teeth could pierce Black's skin.

Sirius clutched at his already bruising neck and could do little else than stare blankly at Severus and he dangled and dripped. Though it was too late, a teacher hurried over and tried to sort out what had happened. In the end, Snape was sent to the hospital wing and Sirius was ushered along with Remus to their first class of the day.

"I don't know why you boys can't stop your fighting. You just can't be happy unless someone loses an eye." Madam Pomfrey held up her wand to Snape's bleeding face, "Episkey," and with a painful snap the cartilage in his nose was as good as new again. She handed him a warm, damp bit of cloth to wipe the red off his face with and sent him on his way without even noticing how he mouthed at the moist rag now soaked in his own blood.


	3. Chapter 3

Snape was not just one of the smartest students at Hogwarts, he was **the** smartest, at least in his own mind. So it was no great surprise that shortly after the hunger pains had ebbed and he came to realize that he was still sucking on a bloody washcloth, Snape compiled a list of his ailments and quickly placed his symptoms into neat little rows on a piece of parchment. Sensitivity to light, drinking blood, hours worth of time lost from memory the night before. The few things that his list pointed to made him frown. He hastily crossed off things like Chupacabra, Kappa, Sigbin and Lamia, he was not born one and they were not contagious. He brushed some of his greasy hair from his eyes and looked at the last word scrawled on his list. Vampire.

If he was completely honest with himself, he already knew it was the only feasible possibility, but he had hoped he could possibly just be ill with something else. After all, true vampirism would mean he would have to hand his wand over to the ministry. He wouldn't' t be counted as a wizard anymore, and if he so much as stepped out of line, the hunters would be set upon him. Life, if you could call it that, as a vampire was no life at all. However, so long as he still needed to breath, so long as he was still alive, he was technically only a half vampire, a Dampier.

With already one class missed that day, he decided to take a detour to the library for a bit of extra research and in light of his current situation he did see it as a waste of time. An hour and three books later he felt secure in the fact that as long as he didn't die, his 'condition' would not worsen and he would not have his wand revoked. It would be manageable and no one needed to know. The only problem he could foresee would be eating.

The blood craving would come again, though he didn't know when, and it wouldn't be long before his own juices would no longer satisfy him, but only make him hungrier. But the thought of drinking someone else's blood disturbed him. How much would he need to take? Who would he feed from? How would he get about without getting caught? Then again, Lupin had been sneaking out and running rampant since year one, surely he could as well, and if four people could make it through the halls undetected, Snape by himself should theoretically have an easy time of it.

It was not until weeks later that he had to test his sneaking skills. The blood lust had been growing slowly for days, but he had put off trying to eat for disgust of the meal and just so that he would know how long he could last. But by the end of that second night the cravings had become insatiable, it was almost all he could think about, so to save himself from simply biting the first person he saw, he left the dorms in search of a meal that would not be as vile as eating from a fellow Slytherin.

After so many years on friendly terms with Lily which ended only last year, he knew exactly where the Griffindor tower was. Naturally he couldn't just waltz in through the main portrait as he didn't know the current password, but as he could feel himself getting stronger these past few days, he decided to venture a climb. Getting outside from the dungeons was easy, but looking up at how far up the castle's high walls his new strength would have to take him, the remainder of his hunt would prove far more difficult. His better judgment told him it was a foolish venture, but his hunger drove him on.

Hogwarts was not a smooth and perfect castle and so he was able to find places to grip as he climbed. He had never been a strong person, in all honesty, Lily probably could have beaten him in an arm wrestling match, but as he climbed higher and higher he did not feel the familiar weakness burning in his muscles, and before he knew it he was face to glass with one of the windows that graced the Gryffindor dorms.

To his relief, the early school year nights were still warm enough to prompt the residents to keep their windows open to let in the fresh air. So, he carefully perched upon the wide window shelf and let himself in. If he had been a full vampire, he knew he would have needed permission to enter the private dormitories, but as it was, no such magic prevented him from silently picking out his first victim. Not wishing to rick waking any one by needlessly walking about, he settled on the bed closest to the window and slowly parted its canopy.

To his dismay, there behind the curtains lay the very recognizable sleeping form of James Potter. Snape almost left then to go find another room, but at the same time, he could hardly pass up the chance to hurt such a nemesis. He quietly cast 'petrificus', just in case James felt a need to awaken, then crept onto the bed, pulling the draperies closed behind him.

Under the effect of the spell, Potter's arms and legs became straight and stone stiff making him easy to roll over on his side and get at his neck. However, James had always been a light sleeper, and as he was rolled over his already open eyes looked straight at his attacker. Despite Snape's hunger, James' gaze startled Severus away from his prey causing him to fall ungracefully off the bed with James still frozen, humming in terror. The noise from Snape's hard landing on the floor and Potter's muffled screams woke some of the others in the small bedroom chamber. Severus could hear them rising from their beds to see what was the matter, and in a moment of panic, Severus untangled himself from the torn canopy and jumped out of the open tower window.

Snape awoke two days later in the hospital wing, sore and hungry, so very hungry. The room should have been too dark for him to see properly but the bits of moonlight filtering in through the tall windows perfectly outlined the rows and rows of beds. Each one depressingly empty other than his and a small sleeping form on the bed closest to the door. The only thought in his whole mind was that he needed to eat. He slid from his bed and padded barefooted to the sleeping meal.

Lupin, as sickly looking as ever, slept restlessly on his cot unaware of the danger he was in. Uncaring if he was recognized now or not, Severus pounced on the sleeping figure with the full brunt of his strength, and as his human teeth sank painfully into Lupin's neck, the young werewolf awoke screaming in agony.


	4. Chapter 4

The transition between the medical wing and Dumbledore's office was a blur to Snape. He had vague notions of Madam Pomphry removing him from his dinner, but everything else was lost in a haze of his warm filled belly. It felt like being drunk and despite himself when he came to realize that he was standing before the frowning old headmaster, he smiled. The harder he tried to constrain his sudden amusement the more difficult it became to remain standing and before he knew what he was doing he had sat down in a chair and was wiping tears of mirth from his eyes.

Dumbledore only frowned harder. "Are you quite aware of yourself, Mr. Snape?"

Severus could only cover his mouth to muffle his incessant giggling. He had no idea why he felt so elated and giddy, but he couldn't bring himself to care. He felt wonderful, warm and alive, and no amount of scowling from a wrinkled old man could deprive him of his joy.

Looking down at a boy with blood smeared across his mouth, it was obvious to Dumbledore what was going on. Very calmly, he walked over to a tall cabinet and pulled out a medium sized leather case. He opened it, giving Mme. Pomphry a warning look as he withdrew a small silver cross from the case.

The old woman braced herself, Snape felt her tensing more than he actually saw it, and then he saw why. The crazy old fool of a wizard was gingerly holding a silver cross in his general direction. He swallowed down another giggle, wiping a hand over his mouth before he could seem to find words through the laughter that still plagued him. "Headmaster, what are you planning to do with that?" Then his shoulders were shaking too hard for him to say anything else. He was no vampire, and such a trinket had no chance of hurting him unless Dumbledore planned to club him over the head with it.

"I plan to rule out certain possibilities. Now, if you would be so kind to remain in your seat," he drew out a small vile of what looked like ordinary water and opened it, "and hold out your hand?"

Seeing no reason not to, Severus held out his hand as he was told and let Dumbledore sprinkle a few drops of the clear liquid onto his skin.

At first, Snape felt nothing as the liquid dripped over the side of his hand and onto the Headmaster's desk, but much to his surprise, the water temperature skyrocketed and his skin burned as though he were touching a hot cauldron.

Obeying the earlier request he did stay in his seat, but he also felt far more sober than he had since arriving in the man's office. He pulled his hand away, furiously shaking the water from his skin then blowing on the reddened palm of his hand where angry blisters had already started to form. He looked up at the somewhat senile headmaster with a hardly restrained murderous look.

"Well, at least you haven't converted fully." Dumbledore sat wearily in his chair, looking slightly more sympathetic than before. "You can thank Mme. Pomphry for that. Falling from that window almost killed you."

Pomphry flustered slightly, but clearly stated that, "My skills would have proved useless if his healing abilities weren't already more advanced than most. Any normal boy would have died from such a fall."

Dumbledore simply smiled at the witch's humility. "Then we are fortunate he remains unharmed."

Severus nearly drew his wand at the heartless remark. "Unharmed? You burned my hand!"

"With holy water, if that means anything to you."

"It means I will have difficulty in my potions class as this is my cutting and stirring hand." He grumbled, still cradling his hand.

"And what does this mean for me, Headmaster?" Lupin's soft voice, so close to Snape, made him start.

The werewolf was sitting in the chair beside him and it was a wonder to Snape that somehow he had not noticed the boy before. He was paler than normal, his fair skin almost transparent where it could be seen peeking from beneath the thick wool blanket he wore tightly pulled around his shoulders.

Dumbledore sighed, "Well, I dare say, Mr. Lupin, that your earlier condition will save you from any unfortunate side effects save for feeling a bit tired until you build up a new blood supply. Even that shouldn't take you very long, and the … marks on your neck should fully heal over time."

"Will they scar?"

The concern in the young boy was touching, and Dumbledore smiled kindly, that old twinkle returning to his eye, and shook his head reassuringly.

Lupin looked relieved, relaxing slightly into the big chair and taking one of the lemon drops that Dumbledore suddenly felt a need to offer him. None were held in Snape's direction and his good mood from earlier had completely dissipated. He hunched his shoulders and watched Lupin, noting the white bandages around his neck, and realizing suddenly why the stinking werewolf was in the office with them.

With his uninjured hand, Snape touched his mouth, feeling the grit of dried blood smeared over his lips. He should have been repulsed that he had bitten the other student, but he didn't. It had been such a satisfying meal that he felt himself licking his lips at the memory.

Lupin, feeling Snape's eyes on him, turned just in time to see him leering at him and licking the dry blood from off his lips. This made Remus feel slightly uncomfortable.

"Mr. Snape."

Severus suddenly snapped back to reality and looked back up at the old man calling his attention.

"I hope you understand that I cannot put the other students at risk by allowing you to stay enrolled at this school."

"What?" Snape barely managed to hiss the word out through his shock and rage. "You let the werewolf prowl around but you can't let _me _endanger people!"

Dumbledore simply leaned back in his chair, his fingers placed together in a steeple. "Lupin has yet to harm anyone."

"His friends intentionally tried to kill me less than two months ago and were allowed to remain here." Snape glared at the old man, knowing that the steely look would have little to no effect. "If they're allowed to stay here with only a measly detention, than I demand the same punishment and to be permitted to remain on campus."

"With all due respect, Professor, you give me a great deal of help to make sure I don't hurt anyone… can't you do the same for Snape?" Lupin knew well what it was like to be dangerous to the people he cared about, and he also knew that if Dumbledore hadn't put himself on the line just to enroll him, he would have never made it this far. Snape may be a risk, but in Lupin's opinion, he was a risk worth taking.

"Well, I might be able to arrange something… if Mr. Snape is willing to put forth the necessary effort?"

"Whatever, as long as I get to stay."

"Very well… I suppose I could ask Slughorn to pull some strings with some of his more questionable friends to bring in steady blood supply… but if I hear about another attack or even another poor attempt, I'll have your wand faster than you can say expulsion. Do I make myself perfectly clear?"

"Perfectly, Sir." Snape stood, not waiting to be dismissed. He was quite finished being berated and ridiculed by the daft headmaster. He left the office and the others behind him, being careful of his hand that still throbbed, and made his way back to the infirmary.


	5. Chapter 5

Snape chewed on a sad looking bloodipop as he tried to pay attention to his transfiguration lesson. The crimson candy was the only thing he had that he could help quell his bloodlust in public without drawing too much attention to himself. His cravings were becoming more and more common, but the regular supply of bottled blood kept him full enough not to pounce on anyone who ventured to close for their own safety. Still, his meals were nothing like his first meal had been. It was as though he was being forced to live off a diet of cold pork-n-beans while being surrounded at all times by hot, pulsing, filet mignons. He felt his eyes drifting from the blackboard to the second row of students, where sat the most tempting filet of all.

As if feeling someone's eyes upon him, Remus reached up and nervously ran a hand through his sandy blond hair. They boy was fighting the need to look over his shoulder and his subtle movements would turn the pale skin of his neck just enough that Severus could see the arterial vein thrumming just out of reach.

Snape chewed none too gently on his bloodipop and hastily scrawled out a note on a torn piece of parchment. As class let out for the afternoon, he hurried to the front of the room, with the pretense of asking the teacher a question, but really it was just an excuse to slip the little note in between Remus' books.

It wasn't until the following morning that Lupin found the hastily written letter which read simply,

Lupin, I need to speak with you.

In private.

Snape

Lupin turned in his seat to find Severus already looking straight at him before looking back at the note. He had a feeling he already knew what the Slytherin wanted to talk about, but couldn't think of a way of weaseling out of it without feeling guilty.

He quickly glanced back again and nodded, hoping his friends didn't notice his suspicious behavior.

Snape felt the slightest tinge of victory. Remus was such a doormat. Anyone could see that by the way that he let himself be pushed around by boys like Potter and Black. And whereas Snape had always felt that it was the werewolf's biggest downfall he personally had no qualms with using it against the boy just once. Snape needed a proper meal and that meal was watching him wearily from his place at the front of the class.

Before lunch, Snape had successfully passed Lupin another note somehow even more short and direct than the last one.

Midnight

Astrology tower

()()()

When midnight came and went, Snape was almost angry enough to climb back up Griffindor tower and fetch the boy himself, but his thoughts were interrupted by the sound of footsteps hesitantly climbing up the steps to meet him.

Snape stopped his frustrated pacing to watch Lupin's sandy blonde head slowly peeking up at him, his bright eyes catching in the moon light. "I hope you haven't been waiting for too long." He kept as much distance as he could between himself and the oily boy.

"It's almost one." Snape growled.

"I'm sorry," he admonished softly.

"What took you so long?"

Remus shuffled his feet for a bit before bothering to answer. "I wasn't sure about coming."

Snape only rolled his eyes. "Well, at least you're here. I wanted to talk to you about a proposition. I need fresh blood. This bottled crap just isn't doing it for me, and since you're the only werewolf on campus you're the only one I can feed from without spreading the curse."

Lupin took a wary step back. "I'm not your food, Snape."

"Everyone is food, Lupin." He crossed his arms. "What I'm offering is an even deal. You get your well to do friend, Potter to get the supplies for me, and I'll make you a fresh batch of wolfsbane every month in exchange for a snack to tide me over."

Remus looked almost like he wanted to turn and run back down the stairs. "I'm not food."

"The wolfsbane would be more than beneficial to your general sickly nature." Snape insisted in the most gentle way that he could, not wanting to lose the best thing he had ever tasted.

The werewolf was hugging himself and watching Snape like a cornered animal.

Severus sighed, "Alright, I'm sorry I attacked you before, but I need to eat. I'm not going to be crazy if you let me drink from you again. I'm not starving like I was before, I just… you… I want to try again."

"But it'll still hurt. You don't even have fangs or anything. It's just teeth shoving their way into my skin." He closed his eyes and rubbed the sore spot where Snape had originally bit him. "It's still bruised."

"I can use a numbing spell… and I'm sure Pomphry has something for bruises if you'd just ask for it."

The doormat stopped rubbing his neck and looked resigned with the smallest nod. "If you give me a list of what you need, I'll have James by the ingredients."

Snape could not help but smile with the victory he had just won. He moved across the tower faster than he thought that he could, to loom over the shorter Remus whose eyes had widened with the sudden closeness.

"Then shall we begin?" Severus ignored the poor boys hesitation and pulled out his wand, casting a charm on Lupin's skin that felt cold and then like nothing at all. Severus nuzzled excitedly into the numb flesh. "Can you feel this?"

"N-no." Lupin squeezed his eyes shut and balled his hands into fists. He was sure that, somehow, it was still going to hurt and it was a good many moments before the tingling in his fingertips told him Snape had already begun to drink.

Remus stood stiffly , trying not to shake. He tried to remind himself that it did not hurt, it was just the adrenalin that was making his chest tighten and his heart pound.

Snape drank hungrily. It had not been long since the attack in the hospital wing, but he had already forgotten some of the bitter sweetness of the werewolf's blood. He pressed closer, loving the way that he could feel the other's heart beating for him, but hating the way that Remus kept shying away ever so slightly. He pulled his arms around the other boy, cutting off his escape and earning a strange, fearful noise in return. It only made his meal that much more irresistible.

It wasn't until he forced himself to stop and cast and closed the wound with his wand that Snape realized from the uncomfortable tightness of his britches that he had enjoyed his meal a bit more than he had expected to.

Thankfully, the werewolf didn't seem to notice.


	6. Chapter 6

Lupin did not sleep well that night even though he felt a bit lightheaded and tired from blood loss. He lay awake most of the night watching the top of his canopy and thinking about what sort of mess he had gotten himself into. Why had he agreed to become Snape's food? Was the promise of wolfsbane really worth giving up a pint of blood every month?

Just as his eyes started to finally drift closed, his roommates had started to wake, grumbling and growling and thumping about. Lupin sighed in frustration and pulled his pillow over his head, trying to block out the light and James' yelling at Sirius to give him back his tie.

"Hey Remus, wake up." Sirius, at least that's who he guessed it was, smacked at the red fabric shielding him from the rest of the room.

"You guys go on ahead of me. I'll be down in a bit."

Sirius, having no respect for anyone's privacy, opened the bed curtains and peered inside. "You not feeling good, mate?"

Remus shielded his eyes from the incoming light. "I didn't sleep very well last night. Just give me five more minutes."

"Bloody hell, what happened to your neck?" Sirius threw himself down beside his friend, jostling him in the most unpleasant way and then proceeding to poke at the tender skin of his bruised throat.

Rolling away quickly, Remus curled up, protecting his flesh as best as possible from his less than gentle friend. "Don't." He hissed.

"Were you out snogging last night?" His eyes lit up with joy for his usually shy friend. "Hey, James! Mooney's been necking." He excitedly called over the attention of his other friend.

James, grinning from ear to ear flopped onto Lupin's bed to join the group. "Who was the lucky skirt? How far'd you get. Common Mooney, spill the beans."

Lupin only curled up tighter around himself. "No one, leave me alone. I just want to get some bloody sleep."

Even lowly Peter excitedly joined in the teasing. "Did you shack up with someone last night?"

"Ooooooooooooo, did you?"

"Did you?"

Both idiots bounding on either side of him on his bed were starting to really get on his nerves.

"There wasn't any skirt." He threw his pillow at James, then immediately felt bad even if it didn't hurt him. "Can't you guys just let me alone for five bloody minutes?"

"If there wasn't any girl, then how'd you get that brilliant bite?" Sirius unrelentingly started to pry Remus' tired hands away from his neck so the other boys could see.

"Oh, she's a bitter." James was grinning wider if possible and hugging the projectile pillow. "I didn't know you were into that sort of stuff, you sly git."

"I'm not. Oh for Merlin's sake." Lupin gave up the fight and let Sirius drag him out of bed. After he freed his arms he put on a new shirt buttoning it all the way up in hopes that no one else would see the mark.

With a light shove, Sirius bumped past him. "We can still see it. There'll be no covering it up. Everyone's gonna know about what you did last night."

James jumped off Lupin's bed and hurried over to his own to finish getting ready for the day. "Yeah. Hey Padfoot, we should keep our eyes out for a lady with any fresh hickeys."

"Ha ha, yeah. You might as well just tell us who it was. We're going to find out sooner or later anyway."

"No you won't." Remus said a little too quickly and when he saw his friend's eyes light up he knew he had just dug himself in deeper. Now fully dressed for the day, Lupin grabbed his things and ran from their room, not like a coward, just like a man escaping interrogation. He ate breakfast quickly and did his best to hide from his overzealous friends for the better part of the day. Not an easy task, but he was still tried and the peace and quiet was worth it.

The best hiding place he found was the library, as neither James, Sirius or Peter even seemed to know where it was. He spent his lunch amongst the books, finding and carefully making a list of the ingredients that he would need to ask James for.

He had no idea how expensive the ingredients would end up being, or if James would even be willing to supply them, but he was hopeful everything would somehow just work out the way he wanted it to for once.

After his list was finished, he went ahead and stayed in his quiet sanctuary for a while more, taking an unintentional two hour nap head down on one of the many study tables. By the time he awoke, he was startled to discover that he was no longer sitting alone.

"Tired?" Snape was smiling, sitting casually beside him. Lupin noticed Snape's usual unattractive teeth had somehow become perfectly straight and glistening white. His new condition must have felt a need to improve his built in eating utensils, but as Lupin's eyes came more into focus, he realized Snape's teeth weren't the only improvement to the boy's looks.

His skin looked less sallow and more like porcelain, and his hair was considerably less oily. He looked almost like a normal, if not very pale, person.

Lupin tried to return the smile, but he knew that it came as more of a grimace as he sat up and instinctively held a hand to his neck. "No, I'm all right." He glanced around the library, dismayed at the fact that no one else seemed to be lingering in the back corner of the library with them.

Snape grinned more confidently than Lupin had ever seen and leaned back comfortably in his chair. "You know, I think this whole ordeal as done me a bit of good. I feel… alive for the first time in my life. Isn't that hilarious?"

"Yeah, " Lupin looked around again, hoping to spot anyone else in the room with them, but he found no one. Even the librarian was out of view and Lupin was beginning to feel like a caged animal all over again, "hilarious."

"How's your neck? I didn't take too much did I?" He leaned closer as if sensing Remus' discomfort and playing into it. "I'm still learning, you know."

"I'm fine… it's fine." He had spent the better part of his day trying to avoid his loud and useless friends, but sitting so close to Snape, being eyed like a fresh hunk of veal, he wished that his mates where there with him.

"Really." He reached over and pulled at Lupin's collar. "Still looks bruised to me."

Lupin lurched away from his touch and stood up. "I told you, it's fine."

"You didn't even go the hospital wing, did you? Really Lupin, If you're not going to take care of yourself I'm going to start feeling guilty about this."

"When was I supposed to go?" Despite his usual submissiveness, all the day's agitation and his general lack of blood was putting him on edge. "I can't just walk into the infirmary at one in the morning for bruise savant without Pomphry getting suspicious. You heard what Dumbledore said. One more bite and you're out."

"Perhaps I can brew something for it… it would only be fair." Snape smiled again but it did little to put Remus at ease.

"I can't ask James for ingredients for that too. He's going to start wondering what's going on." He held tightly to the list that he had made, needing something to hold on to.

"Oh, those sorts of potions are simple, I'll just make up one during my next potions class." He was watching Remus while he talked, too close and too intensely.

"Oh, well. As long as it's not a problem." He started making a pile of books to put back away, hoping that Snape would get the hint that it was time to go.

"No problem at all." He kept his Cheshire Cat smile as he watched Lupin skitter away from the table with his books making to attempt to follow him. "Oh, Lupin."

He turned to see a very unsettling predatory gleam in Snape's hollow, depthless black eyes that made the hairs on his arms and neck stand on end.

"See you later."


	7. Chapter 7

"So let me get this straight," James was squinting into the bright afternoon sunlight, "you need these ingredients to make a 'it won't be so bad' werewolf potion?"

"Could you please buy them, James? I don't' have that kind of money." Remus was not used to asking his friends for things and by the look on Potter's face, he did not intend to make a habit of it.

He looked over the list again and started one of his scheming smiles. "This is a long list, Mooney… I think it would only be fair to make this a bit of a trade."

Perhaps, he thought, he should have seen this coming. Of course James would want something in exchange, "but I don't have anything."

James only smiled more suspiciously. "Sure you do, you've got brains and a knack for hard work. And apparently a hidden skill for potions, so I thought, since I'm horrible at them maybe you could write my potions papers for me."

"All of them?"

"Well yeah. Can't be too much extra work for you, I mean, we don't have to write reports every day."

"Yes, but, often enough… I dunno…" He looked up at his friend, then remembered that he already did most of the research for James' papers anyway. It couldn't be that much more work… could it?

"Come on, with your brains, it'll be easy as pie. Easier than pie, it'll be cake." James clapped him on the back, making him stumble.

"I suppose?"

"There's a chum." James was beaming as if he had won and they both knew that he had.

By the next day Remus had everything from the list, and looking at the large package wrapped in brown paper, he had no idea how he was to get it to Snape without his friends noticing.

Then he remembered how good a climber Severus was to have reached the Gryffindor tower window. He could wait till his friends were asleep, and then place the package on a nearby ledge just outside one of the tower's windows and Snape could retrieve it later.

He passed Severus a note dictating where and when he would drop off the parcel. It was an easily recognizable spot near a stone statue of man with a funny looking hat holding a long feathered quill which also happened to be his favorite statue as none of the others looked half as ridiculous.

He set the box beside the strange statue man's legs and made to go back to his dorms before his roommates noticed he had left, but as he turned around, there stood Sirius.

Remus jumped and held a hand to his heart. "Padfoot… why are you here?"

"Why are you here?" Black quirked an eyebrow at him, peeking back at the parcel that his friend had left behind.

Lupin looked around, but as he was currently out on a flat bit of rooftop and Sirius was blocking the window, he knew he was completely trapped. "Would you believe I was just getting some fresh air?"

Sirius folded his arms stubbornly. "Is the poof with the funny hat going to make your potion?"

"What? No. That's ridiculous."

"Is it? Then why are you so nicely giving him all of your supplies?"

Remus leaned heavily on the building, growing slowly more and more not ok with being on the ledge. "The ingredients need to be chilled and I thought leaving them outside overnight would work well…" It was a lie. It was a horrible unbelievable lie, but Sirius had never made a single successful potion in his life and could not recognize such an obvious fib.

"Well, come back in then. You don't need to be chilled over night too." Sirius held his arms out to his friend, offering help back inside, but he didn't move out the way. As soon as he had the werewolf in his arms he grinned. "So, who was the dame from the other night?"

"Oh, would you get the bloody hell out of the way and let me in." He held tightly onto his friend not wanting to somehow slip and fall off the roof.

"Not until you tell me. You can sleep out here all night if you want to be stubborn." He laughed heartily until he looked up and saw of all things a creepily staring Snape standing behind Lupin. Instincts kicked in, and before he even knew what he was doing he pulled Remus inside and slammed the window shut. "How the hell did he get out there?"

Remus frowned and looked out over his shoulder. "He who… ?oh… magic… I would guess. Come on, I've got James' potions essay to write." He held tightly to his friend's arm and dragged him away from the window and his view of the leering Snape.

"That creepy bastard has been acting weirder than normal." Sirius linked arms with his mate and did not seem like he had any intention of letting him alone to write his multiple essays.

"Yeah. I guess so." He walked with Sirius hooked on his arm back to their room where James and Peter were sill fast asleep. He grabbed his potions book, some parchment, and his ink and quill and went back downstairs to the common room with Sirius right behind.

"You're not having any problems with him you're not telling us about, are you?"

How Sirius, who was so dense when it came to school work, could always know when something was up always baffled Lupin. "Why would you think that?"

"He was in our room… in James' bed, he bit me and now he's following you around on ledges… in the dark." He threw himself onto one of the old sofas in the common room and smiled at his friend. "Maybe he fancies us?"

Lupin shuddered at the thought. "I think perhaps you should go to bed."

"What, you don't think he could be a poof? With everything else that's wrong with him I wouldn't be surprised."

"There's nothing wrong with being different."

Sirius laughed, "So you wouldn't care if old Snivy had the hots for you?" He shook off the thought with a grimace. "If I ever found out an ugly git like that fancied me I'd bet the idea straight out of him."

"But you wouldn't care if a good looking fella liked you?"

Sirius chuckled in a good natured way. "Course not! Plenty of blokes fancy me and if they're pretty enough I give 'em a good snog as a thanks."

"Thanks?" Remus found himself wishing he had different friends.

"For the complement. You got to take all the complements you can get, Moony. We won't always be so young and dashing."

Remus only sighed and started writing James' paper, but for some reason, the idea of Sirius snogging some guy proved to be distracting. "You'd really snog a guy?"

Sirius shrugged. "Why not? I don't see the point on limiting my options. Why, you interested?"

The cocky smile on Sirius' face made Lupin glare, but no amount of angry eyes could hide the blush creeping up on his cheeks. "Don't be stupid." He turned away, feeling the heat on his skin that told him his embarrassment was completely visible.

Sirius stood up slowly from his seat and leaned over the sandy haired boy now curled in on himself over the table for protection. "You wanna?"

"I've got mine and James' potions essay and your herbology homework to do tonight. I don't have time for your nonsense." He furiously turned some pages, hoping to look busy and to fan himself.

Sirius firmly took hold of Remus' shoulders and turned him away from the books he so desperately clung to as if they could ward off Black's attentions.

"Do you think I'm handsome, Moony?" He was smiling one of his damnably confidant smiles. "Do you… fancy me?"

"Sod off."

Black laughed and let him go. "You're no fun Mooney. Learn to relax. Merlin."

Lupin went back to his books frustrated and annoyed while Sirius sat back in his chair and ultimately fell asleep.

In the morning, Sirius woke among a crowd of giggling first years, unaware of the inky facial hair and the few choice words Lupin had left on his face as a gentle reminder to keep his hands to himself in the future.


	8. Chapter 8

The wolfsbane was more complicated than Severus had originally given it credit for. It was after almost two weeks of struggling to adjust the proportions of the ingredients and brewing away that he finally had a workable potion. He proudly passed the customary note to Remus during their transfiguration class, letting him know to meet him out beside the lake during dinner when everyone else would be busy and they could make their trade.

Severus didn't have to wait long before Lupin's slender form came into view. "Thanks for coming on time, for once."

Lupin glared and shoved his hands into his worn pockets. "Do you have it?"

"Of course." He held up a slender bottle with a cork shoved into it, but made no move to hold it out any farther.

After all the extra homework and smug glances from Sirius, Lupin was too tired and his nerves were too strained for him to care if Snape was trying to be coy, he just wanted his potion. He closed the remaining gap and reached for the shimmering bottle, but Severus only held it out of his reach.

"I'm tired and hungry and I don't have time for this, Severus," he was hoping that by using the other boy's first name that perhaps it would put more weight to what he was saying, "and if I don't get back soon, they're going to wonder where I got off to." He nodded back at the castle. He didn't need to say who would come looking for him as they both knew, but Severus didn't seem worried.

"Well, Remus," his tone was gently mocking, "as this is a trade I would like my snack before you go. If you cooperate, it shouldn't take long, then you can fill up on the crap you people usually eat and I can sneak in in time for some dessert."

Being more impatient than usual, Lupin lunged for the bottle and caught the bottom of it, but Snape stubbornly held onto its neck. "I already let you eat off me. This is your payment. I don't owe you anything else until I need another batch.

"I never said it would be one for one, Remus. I give you what you need, and you give me what I need."

"This deal is getting worse all the time." Lupin grumbled and hastily loosened his big wooly scarf that James' mum had knitted for him the Christmas before. "Well, hurry up. I've got four essays to write tonight and I need to go get started."

Snape would have frowned at the excessive amount of work, but he was too preoccupied with the pale and slender neck offered to him. He pressed his wand to the werewolf's neck, mumbling a numbing spell before chewing his way through the layer of skin and to the pulsing vein below.

It was heaven, just like he remembered it. Lost in the haze of his thoughts, Severus dropped his wand and wrapped his arms around his meal.

Lupin kept his arms at his sides, though, he had to admit, although he couldn't feel the pain, the attention his neck was getting felt almost…good. He closed his eyes and allowed himself to enjoy the sensation, when one of Snape's hands drifted lower and greedily squeezed his posterior.

Snape could feel Remus stiffen in his arms, and worrying that he might pull away, slipped the bottle of wolfsbane into the werewolf's pocket and firmly placed his other hand on the other side of his narrow backside. They battled quietly, Lupin grabbing gently at Snape's hands and moving them anywhere other than the southward direction that they insisted on.

"Damn it, Snape, I never agreed to helping out with those kinds of needs, now keep your hands above the waist or you can forget about the whole thing."

Severus pulled back, the corners of his mouth wet with fresh blood. "You wouldn't do that, you need me."

Lupin glared over at the dark haired boy. "No I don't. Now that James is buying the supplies, I'm sure Dumbledore could make Slughorn supply the finished potions if I asked him to."

Snape searched Lupin's eyes and could see he wasn't lying. He nodded quickly, eager not to lose his meal. "All right, above the waist."

"Good. I don't need you getting all 'mister big hands' on me." He kept his head tilted to one side, not so much as in an offering but as an effort to keep the blood from running down and staining his shirt.

The remainder of the meal didn't last long before Severus knew he should stop. He pulled back and whipped out another, smaller, bottle from his cloak. "Here. This will help with the cuts and the bruising."

Lupin took the bottle, avoiding eye contact with the Slytherin. "Thanks."

"All part of our deal. I'll wait out here for a while more to avoid us walking into the hall together. Oh, and you might want to stop by a privy on the way in to wash the red off your neck."

"Yeah, thanks." He carefully wrapped his scarf around his neck and made his way back to the school.

Snape watched him go, admiring the view, and then found a nice rock to sit on while he relished in the borrowed warmth that filled him. He tucked his knees up to his chest and let a slow breath. It wasn't that he particularly liked Remus one way or the other, but that couldn't keep him from daydreaming about his smell or the warmth of him, or the way that he fit so well against him. Of course, he knew his fascination with the boy may purely have been that he associated him with absolute bliss, and he was drunk.

He watched the horizon as twilight colored the sky for another ten minutes or so before he washed his face off in the lake water and joined his class mates for something sweet.

Inside, Lupin was sitting with his friends, grateful for the chilly weather and the excuse to wear his scarf. The last thing he needed was more harassing jibes about necking with some girl. He could only imagine what the rest of the marauders would say if they knew he had just met up with Snape and got his butt repeatedly fondled.

Like a sixth sense, Remus knew exactly when Snape came into the great hall. He could feel the half-vampire's gaze on him like his hands had been only a short while before. He shifted uncomfortably on the bench where he sat beside James and Sirius and tried to hide his face behind a book, pretending to study while the others ate.

"You're looking a bit warm there, Moony." Sirius whispered against his ear.

"Not now." He was low on blood and low on energy to deal with his friend's well meaning taunts.

"Maybe you could use a bit of help out of those heavy winter clothes?"

Thinking there was no way he could be serious, Lupin was just going to ignore his friend's stupid teasing, that is, until he felt a hand sneak onto his upper thigh. He looked over in shock at Black who was far too close for comfort. "What the hell –" but before Lupin could finish his question, and much to Sirius' surprise, a large ball of blancmange pudding hit Black forcefully on the back of the head.

"What the hell!" He removed his hand from Lupin's leg to touch the slimy mess oozing down his neck.

Remus laughed softy. "Serves you right, you git." He was rubbing at his leg, trying to rid himself of the lingering feelings of being touched. He had no idea what was wrong with everyone today that they all kept touching him.

But Sirius was no longer paying attention to the werewolf, he was too busy searching the tables of students for who threw the pudding. No one was looking at them and he huffed, sitting back down and sulking.

James was grinning. "Nice hair, Black."

"It's a new fashion I'm starting. Custard hair. You should try it." And within moments the table had erupted into a battle field of sweeties and puddings and pasties. Other tables joined it, despite the few lingering faculty's attempts to quell the food riot.

Remus snagged a handful of chocolate tarts and made a break for it. He had papers to write and no time for flinging deserts or the detention that followed in the aftermath.


	9. Chapter 9

By October, Severus Snape had a definite crush on his supper. Most of his time was spend thinking of looks to give him in hallways or passing him notes to remind him of his obligations as a snack, but the longer it went on, the more Severus began feeling guilty for forcing Lupin to comply with his cravings.

Eventually, the scathing looks as Lupin left him with after their trading sessions became too much for Snape, and he was forced to call the whole thing off.

"If you want, I'll still make your potions, after all, I have nothing else to do during my sleepless nights."

Lupin was frowning at him, not necessarily in anger, but in a way that made Snape wish he could read minds. "What…" the werewolf started hesitantly, his cheeks taking on the slightest hint of a blush, "do you want instead of a snack?"

It was Snape's turn to frown. "Nothing." Then it dawned on him what the other boy might be referring to. "N-nothing at all." Not that he would have minded, but even a person as slimy and cruel as Snape would not take use a gentle soul like Lupin's. "I could only take advantage of you for so long. I don't like constantly feeling guilty… it ruins the meal."

That was an answer Lupin had not expected. "You felt guilty? But, we agreed on it. You weren't forcing me into it or anything."

Severus rolled his eyes. "Yes I was."

"But-"

"Your arm's easier to twist than a twist tie. Really Lupin, you really need to start standing up for yourself. It does loads of good for you." And Severus would know. Ever since the change, he had been more confident, more aggressive, and people had noticed. It was nice to get the respect he felt he deserved for once in his life.

Remus sighed softly and examined his shoes. "Then, you don't need to make any more potions for me."

"Did it help you?"

"You don't owe me anything." He was shoving his hands in his pockets and looking increasingly more uncomfortable.

"Did it help?"

"Yes." Remus mumbled.

"Then I will have another bottle for you before the next full moon."

"I don't feel comfortable with you doing this for me without me being able to pay you for it."

"Don't worry about it. I know how it is to be poor. Just because you can't buy it for yourself doesn't mean you don't deserve it."

Never in a million years would Remus have thought deep inside Severus could be a thoughtful person, almost even kind. Kinder than any of his friends were at least, and that was something Lupin could appreciate. "I want to."

"… Want to what?"

"If you're bringing me a potion, I want to pay you for it. I don't suddenly deserve things just for being poor, Snape. I want to work for the things I have in life. It makes them better."

"You want to feed me?" It seemed unbelievable if only for the fact that Remus had always made a point of not being happy about Snape eating from him.

"Just because you can't buy proper food for your self doesn't mean that you don't deserve it." Lupin smiled then, and it was warm and sweet without the smallest hint of pity.

Severus raised his eyebrows, genuinely surprised by Lupin's reaction. "Well I'm not about to argue with you. If you want to let me, than I'd be glad to, but just know you're not doing this because you have to anymore."

"Deal." Although nothing really had changed in the arrangement, the fact that he could say no if he wasn't in the mood without risking anything was liberating.

"Deal." They shook hands and Severus held onto the physical contact. Very slowly, he used his grip to pull Lupin in, leaning only slightly to the side to reach the curve of his neck.

Remus' warm smile remained as he tilted his head, giving as much of his pale neck to Severus as he wanted to take. The Slytherin couldn't help himself from returning the smile, though his was lacking in some of the genuine feeling of comfort. He didn't expect that he would have ever met someone who would have accepted him so willingly as a normal person, much less as half vampire. He hesitated there, feeling strangely wanted.

"I told you it's ok." Remus was almost laughing, though he tried to keep his voice down just in case someone was passing by and might hear them. He did not seem to understand the reason for Severus' hesitation, and as a misplaced sign of goodwill, he gently took hold of the Slytherin's robe and pulled him in close.

Severus didn't even have time to contemplate pulling back and gently he brushed his lips against the soft skin. He knew he hadn't numbed his neck yet, but at the same time, he wasn't willing to pull away again. So, he nipped and nibbled without breaking the skin and instead, as long as Lupin would let him, he focused on giving him a hickey.

Lupin was more than a little surprised, but after making such a bit deal about wanting him to eat, he'd just feel awkward for pushing him away now. Besides, if he was really honest with himself, he liked it, and found himself tangling his hand in Snape's silky black hair.

They stayed tucked up in that corner together, for how long, Remus did not know. And it wasn't until he felt a hand firmly grasping his backside that he finally summoned the will to edge away. He backed up, taking hold of both Snape's hands so he would know where they were. "I-I think that's enough. You obviously aren't hungry tonight."

Severus' eyes were just as unfocused and dreamy looking as if he had been drinking the entire time. "No, I didn't want to be tempted. I was coming to break this off, if you remember."

"I remember." Lupin barely mumbled the words. Their faced were still so close, and he could feel the warmth of Snape's breath on his face. He didn't know why he didn't pull farther away, even as Snape began to lean closer again, only this time, he wasn't aiming for Lupin's neck.

The kiss was not unexpected, or wholly unwelcome, though Remus was still shocked to feel Severus' lips on his.

He pulled away as fast as if Snape were still grabbing at his bum. "It's late." He could feel how hot his face was, so hot in fact that he expected to find singe marks later. "I've got to go." And then he ran.

Ran back down the twisted hallways, ran back up the changing staircases, and ran all the way back to Griffindor tower, so out of breath that it took five tries of wheezing out the password before the fat lady would let him in.

"Holy hell, what happened to you?"

But Lupin didn't have the air to answer the younger boy loafing about the common room and headed straight to bed.

"Someone was in the library extra late tonight." James grinned from his own bed.

Remus huffed and quickly tried to pull the curtains of his bed closed, he did not have the energy to deal with his friend.

"Moony, what were you doing in the library?" Sirius was not looking at him, so much as directly at his neck.

Remus hid behind his curtains. "Studying. Tired now. Goodnight." He pushed his hands to his face. What had he done?

Sadly, his friends were not known for keeping to themselves when one of their own returned with such a glorious hickey.

"No you don't." James and Sirius, with Peter only slightly behind, tore open the curtains, grabbed Lupin by the ankles, and dragged him out of bed. "You're gonna fess up this time. You've shown up with one too many love bites for us to let you alone now."

"It's not a love bite!" He was covering his neck and cringing at the fact that that was exactly what Snape had given him.

"Well, it sure as hell wasn't a leach attack." Sirius was struggling to pry his hands away so that everyone could see Lupin's beautiful trophy.

"I fell… on a door handle." He was kicking at the boys, his friends, who were so mercilessly holding him down.

"Does this door handle have a name?" James was grinning and admiring the slew of pink and red bruises trailing down Lupin's pale neck.

Sirius smiled and shook his head. "You know, for a girl… she's very aggressive. You're not secretly necking with a guy are you?"

At that moment, Lupin would have given almost anything to be able to bluff his way out of this, but his friends were getting to close to the truth, and his stunned silence only buried him deeper.

"Holy crap, it is a dude." Sirius looked slightly amused, but also slightly jealous. "Is this why you've been so cold towards me lately?"

"For the last time, Sirius, I'm not interested in you. Or any other bloke for that matter. I'm happy alone, with my studies. Forever." He batted at his friends who still hovered so very close. He didn't want to hurt them, but he also wanted to escape.

"Well, you certainly weren't alone when you got those. Come on, who is he?" James seemed undaunted by the fact that his mate was a bit of a poof. The name of the person he was kissing was far more important than their gender.

"Yeah," Peter pipped in, "who was it?"

Then Lupin happened upon an idea. He stopped struggling, and in the most serious tone possible, he stated the name. "Snape."

"What? Your full of it, come on, who is it?"

Lupin inwardly smiled, it worked. He told them the truth and they didn't believe him. Who would? For once, the truth was the perfect cover. "It's Snape. Oh yeah, him and me. We've been at it for a while now. You wanna know what he tastes like?"

James instantly released his arms. "Merlin, no. How can you even joke about that?"

"That's just wrong." Sirius agreed. "You know, I bet it's one of the teachers." He grinned at James, so quick to release the thought of someone kissing Snape.

"Oh, I bet it is."

The two were quickly caught in a heated debate over who would be worse to kiss, Dumbledore or McGonagall. Remus smiled to himself and slunk back into bed. His mates might bother him about the bites sometime tomorrow, but for at least one more night he would be left alone.


	10. Chapter 10

The next day, Lupin's friends only slightly brought back up the topic of Remus' hickey before the subject of Snape threw them off.

"Speaking of old Snivels, I haven't seen him around much lately. Do you think he's avoiding us?" James only shrugged to Black's off handed question, but Peter promptly spoke up.

"I've seen him. He's elevated himself pretty high up this year. I hear he's very popular among the Slytherins now."

"Popular? You must be kidding. I don't care how good looking the git got, he's still a slimy little… what?"

James looked confused and a little disturbed. "You think Snape is good looking?"

"He maybe bathed, that's all I meant." Sirius waved it off. "He's still a short, stinking git."

Remus couldn't help but smile. Sirius was never good at bluffing and it was good to know that he was not the only one to notice the change in the Slytherin. Mind you, Sirius thought almost anyone or thing was attractive, but at least Remus wasn't alone. "Back off Black, Snape's all mine."

"Gah! Stop saying that! It's too disgusting to think about."

"Really? I thought you said he was hot or something. You're not jealous of Remus are you? Want sweet sweet Snivellus all to yourself?" James laughed at the absurdity of anyone wanting Snape, but Sirius was not amused.

"No. Just, no. Ah. I don't want to talk about it anymore."

Peter just laughed like he always did whenever anyone said anything, but even Remus found the line of teasing amusing. "Hey James, I guess next time Sirius gets a love bite we'll know where it came from."

"I wouldn't be surprised to find out that's where the last couple of them came from." James was grinning, despite the fact that Sirius was looking quite put out to be on the wrong end of their teasing for once. "You know, Sirius, you did say that he tackled you in the great hall and bit you… you wanna talk about it?"

"Oh, shove off, Potter." Sirius took Remus, the only one of their group who wasn't teasing him, by the arm and pulled him off down the hall. "I don't know what got into Prongs, but he's being a real arse this morning."

Remus only smiled and let the prat feel sorry for himself as they entered the great hall. Peter and Potter weren't far behind, laughing and lightly hitting at each other.

"Hey, did you guys see Snape?"

Sirius glared. "Would you stop already?"

"No, no, seriously. He looked like some kind of wilted vegetable."

Peter cackled. "Yeah, even his nose was all droopy."

"Man, Mooney, whad'ya do to him last night?"

"Maybe he broke up with him."

"Is that true? Hey, Sirius, looks like Snape's all freed up."

The pair of boys were practically hysterical from laughter while Sirius sat gloomily with his arms folded and Remus looked around concernedly for any sign of Snape.

It wasn't hard to find him, and indeed, Snape looked like some sort of wilted something or other. He was listlessly stabbing a fork into eggs that looked almost as grey and miserable as he did, all the while sighing so hard that his shoulders shook.

"Blimey." Remus muttered to himself and sat down beside his friends. Maybe Snape had actually needed to eat the night before. Remus felt horrible for running off like he did, especially if it meant that the other boy looked on the pitiful verge of collapse. He promised himself to talk with Snape, see if he needed to eat... sometime today. He had a little storm cloud at his own table to deal with and one problem at a time.

He took a handful of bacon and set it on Sirius' plate, leaning close so that their still laughing palls would not hear them. "Cheer up, Padfoot. I know you don't like him."

Sirius regained his cocky smile and winked at him. "Of course not. I don't think anyone could fancy someone like Snape."

"There's someone for everyone. I wouldn't be surprised if he had a few admirers."

()()()

After transfiguration and just before lunch, Remus caught Snape's eye and motioned to him to follow. He excused himself from his friends and headed off towards the bathroom. Once around the corner, he stopped and waited for Snape to join him.

Snape was not far behind, though still looking as melancholy as he had during breakfast.

"Hey, is everything…" Remus felt so strange asking Snape these sort of things. "I mean, are you all right? You didn't eat last night and today, well…" He trailed off, knowing that they could both see the state that Snape was in.

Severus looked up dismally. "I shouldn't have… I went too far last night. I know you don't…" He sighed, unable to find the words to express how he was feeling. "I'm sorry."

Lupin blinked. "Sorry for what?"

"For ki- for kissing… I know I shouldn't have. I won' do it again."

"Like how you wouldn't grab my butt again?" Remus couldn't help but smile the smallest of smiles. If it were anyone else he would be blushing and stammering and hiding, but his friends had made him realize how ridiculous the whole situation was. After all, this was only Snape.

"I didn't." He folded his arms, defensive.

"You so did." He was starting to blush, but the stammering and awkwardness of the night before had yet to resurface.

"Mmm, well…" Snape looked more unsure of himself than he had in months, and much to Lupin's surprise, a faint blush colored his otherwise ivory cheeks, "you didn't stop me."

Lupin's blush only got worse. "Maybe I got tired of always having to pry your hands of me."

"Or maybe you don't actually mind as much as you let on."

"Maybe I don't." In all honesty, that wasn't what Remus had intended to say, but he said it, and deep inside he knew it was true. Both boys glanced around the halls with sudden shifty eyes.

"Maybe we should continue this conversation somewhere more private?"

Remus knew it was the beginning of lunch and he would have some time before he would be missed. "Yeah." He led the way because, after all, as a Marauder he knew all the best 'out of the way' places that they could talk.

It was a little alcove near the astronomy room, which was only ever in use during the nighttime astronomy classes, so they would remain relatively undisturbed.

"So what did you mean by that, you didn't mind?"

Remus let out a long tired breath. "I don't know."

"Remus."

He turned around to face the dampier and was surprised to see all of Snape's energy and confidence had suddenly returned.

"Do you fancy me?"

He stammered. He didn't know how to respond because he didn't really know the answer himself. "I don't know." He ran a hand through his hair. "Maybe. I don't know." He looked back up at him and didn't move away as Snape stepped in closer.

"So then, you didn't mind the kiss?"

"It … it surprised me. I didn't think you liked blokes."

"Well, I like you." Snape was practically oozing confidence. He never thought he could or would be so forward with anyone about his feelings.

"Oh… that's… swell?" Remus felt his blush deepening. He didn't specifically know how he felt about Snape and his uninvited confession.

He laughed. "Well, if it's so '_swell_' then I guess you approve. How wonderful." He put a hand on Remus' cheek and leaned in again, but unlike last night, Lupin leaned away before their lips could meet.

"I thought you said you were gonna stop that?" He voice was more panicked than he would have liked, and Snape only leaned in further.

"That was before I knew you liked it."

"I didn't say I liked it, just that I might not mind so much… maybe." He was carefully backing away, not wanting to get caught between a wall and a Snape.

"That's not saying that you didn't like it exactly." He leaned in again and was once more gently turned away.

"Snape, I … I'm flattered, but I've got to get to lunch." He started to edge away, looking for an escape.

"You know, you were my first kiss."

That made Lupin stop. It never crossed his mind that he could have been Snape's first, though he supposed it did make sense. Before the change, Snape wasn't what anyone thought of as kissable, but then again, maybe Severus was just as shy as he was. "You were my first too."

Severus' eyes softened and he smiled almost sweetly at him. "I wouldn't have pegged you for being a kiss virgin. You seemed so sought after. Do you fight off everyone so emphatically then, or am I just special?"

"I'm very practiced at keeping my lips away from people." He kind of smiled. Being friends with Sirius had at least taught him a few good tricks.

"I had noticed that… is it always going to be this way, or are you going to warm up to me eventually?" He gently placed his other hand on Remus' other cheek.

"I can't make any promises, Severus. I'm just here to be food."

"No you're not. You're here because I want you to be here, and because you chose to be here with me. Aren't you the least bit curious what a real kiss feels like? Personally, I'm dying to know."

Lupin involuntarily swallowed. He did want to know, but there was never anyone he could try it with. It wasn't easy not knowing if a boy would kiss back or punch you in the face for being some kind of pervert, and even though he now knew Sirius was into blokes, he knew he was only interested in the physical attention. Remus wanted more, he wanted his kisses to mean something more than that, and perhaps to Severus, they would. "If we do this, I don't want you to tell anyone about it. Not until I'm ready."

"All right. Not until you're ready." He couldn't believe his luck!

"Or maybe ever." Remus felt nervous about Snape's large and welcoming smile and the way that he was already leaning in.

"Or ever." He agreed, hesitating right before their lips touched. He didn't want to scare off Remus like he had done the night before.

Remus squeezed his eyes shut and smashed his lips against Severus'. He had no idea what he was doing, and the kiss was horribly awkward and strangely moist. It wasn't all together a grand experience, and occasionally it wasn't even a good one, but as things seemed to settle into a pleasant exchange, he hoped that with time and practice it could really be like what his more amorous friends claimed it was.

Glorious.


	11. Chapter 11

"I can't work on your potions essay in here." Gathering up some scrolls and bookwork, Remus readied himself to leave.

James shrugged. "We're not that loud."

Remus raised an eyebrow at his friends who were currently in the loudest game of wizards' chess that had ever taken place in the Gryffindor common room… ever. "If you want to turn this in tomorrow morning, I need some quiet." He smiled at his friends and patted Sirius' arm as he left.

Once outside, he stowed his things in a darkened corner knowing no one was going to seal blank parchment or some old school books and began his late night journey. He had very little intention on doing any essays that night, and every intention of meeting up with his new 'boyfriend'.

Things had been going great for him and Severus so far. The sneaking around for secret snogs and snack times made every day that much more exiting, and the more time they spent together, the more he thought about Severus when they were apart.

He hurried down the corridor, Marauders map in hand. It was so easy to keep their meetings a secret with the map in his possession. All Lupin had to do was find Snape's floating name and then meet him wherever he happened to be. No notes needed to be passed, no making plans in the halls, just a little game of hide and seek.

He slunk through the night darkened halls, following the little trail of Severus on the map, but when their names converged, there was no Severus to be found. He stood under an awning that lead out to the quidditch field and saw no sign of the boy he had come so far to find. Then someone grabbed his patched, old jacket and pulled him backwards. A very familiar scent of potions and blood filled his nose and he laughed quietly into the sly kiss that crept over his shoulder.

"I found you." Remus whispered, laughing quietly and blushing… he still blushed every time they shared one of their sloppy and awkward kisses.

"I noticed. Pity there isn't a world version of that map, though I suppose it wouldn't be very conveniently sized at that point."

Remus chuckled. "No it wouldn't." He turned around in the other boy's arms and wrapped his own the boy's waist leaning in for another kiss. His heart fluttered a little more than he thought it should have and his mind got all fuzzy whenever they embraced. As far as he was concerned, there was only him and Snape and the warmth between them. It was everything he dreamed a relationship could be like and from the dopy smile that Snape was returning, it was obvious that he felt the same foolish, fuzzy feelings.

"Hey," Snape pushed their noses together in a sweet little nuzzle. "I brought you something."

"I don't need another potion all ready." Remus busied himself with twining an end of his scarf around his beau's neck, sharing even that little bit of warmth.

"It's not a potion." Then Snape summoned from his pocket a beautifully wrapped bar of chocolate.

Lupin opened it and smiled. "What's this for?"

Snape shrugged. "You said chocolate makes you feel better after you transform… so I thought I'd pick some up at Honeydukes for you."

"That's sweet. Thank you," He tucked the chocolate bar in his ropes hopping to save it till he needed it, "but you know you don't have to buy me things."

"I know."

Remus laughed and stole another kiss. He was always so quiet with his friends, it was liberating to be able to just be open up and be enthusiastic with Snape. "You know, this is all still pretty wet and awful."

Snape smiled, blushing a little at the criticism. "I thought it was getting better."

"Oh it's a lot better, but," he grinned and leaned their heads together rocking slightly, "I think we could definitely benefit from a lot more practice."

"Well, if you say so." Snape moved in closer to help Remus with his kissing technique, but something made him pull back and stare off. "Someone's coming." He slinked out of Lupin's scarf and took his hand to lead him away. "Come on." They went up the stairs to the auditorium seating and peered over the edge to see who had dared to interrupt their important practicing.

Far below them, James was leading a hesitant Lily out onto the field. Lupin couldn't make out what they were saying, but the fact that Lily had agreed to sneak out with Potter was surprising enough.

"Think your chum is going to give her a quick quidditch lesson?" Snape hissed in disgust.

"I… really doubt that's what he has in mind. He's supposed to be playing chess with Sirius right now." Remus could feel himself wincing at the fact that Lily was anywhere near James. That poor girl.

Snape glared down at the walking pair for a moment more before he turned away. "Would you like to go on a walk? I don't fancy sticking around here anymore."

"Sure." He took Snape's hand and ventured back down the steps and away from the quidditch field. "Um… Sev?"

"Yeah."

"Did you ever… fancy Lily?" He didn't know why he felt he needed to know, but the anger he saw in Severus' eyes when he saw her with James made him worry.

"What? Eew, no. Why would you even think that?"

"You get so… you don't seem to like them together." Then a thought dawned on him. "Did you… did you like James?"

Snape for a moment looked horrified, then ill, then he just laughed. "Hell no. Heeeeeeeeeellll no. No. No. That's, that's even worse. No. Look, I like guys. Lily was… family. I know it's my fault that she doesn't talk to me anymore, but we were fizzling out anyway." He walked a little longer in thought before he continued. "I guess, it hurts knowing that she's choosing the guy who went out of his way to torment me after I was out of the way… like, I never really mattered to her."

Lupin didn't have any good comforting words to give him, so he just held his hand a little tighter while they walked. "I'm sure… I'm sure that she didn't do it to spite you or anything like that. Lily is a decent person, James is just," he frowned, trying to find the right words, "he's just James. He doesn't take 'no' very easily."

"Yeah, I could tell."

But the tone in Snape's voice seemed to be aimed more at him then at James. "Whadaya mean?"

"Why are you doing his homework? Is he really that retarded that he can't do it himself?"

"No, and I'm not doing _all_ his, I mean, what are you talking about?" He tried to look innocent, but it was obvious Snape could see right through him.

Snape smiled, feeling a small victory at being so observant. "You keep complaining about having a ton of papers to write, way more than anyone else gets assigned, and James only started getting O's on his work just recently."

"How would you know what grade James is getting?"

"I volunteered as an assistant for Slughorn a while ago."

Remus sighed at that. "So you've been helping to grade the papers?" He didn't want to get in trouble, though he didn't think that Snape would turn him in. "I'm trading him. He buys the ingredients for the wolfsbane and I do his papers. It's not a big deal."

"Not a big deal? Your chum is a slacker, who wouldn't even be allowed in this school with his grades unless he kept taking advantage of people like you."

"He's not taking advantage of me. It's a fair trade for the ingredients."

"If you say so." Severus didn't want to fight, he didn't want to risk upsetting Lupin, so he gave up the argument and thought of something else to talk about. "You going home for the Christmas break?"

"Yeah. You?"

"No. I figured I'd have more fun running around the castle with no one else around. Maybe prank the other common rooms."

Lupin smiled. "Sounds fun."

"You should stay."

"I can't, my parents have already made Christmas plans with me."

"Then maybe… maybe I could go home with you?"

Remus looked a little pained. "No. My family is… well they have a hard time with me being… you know. And they don't know about me liking blokes." He shook his head. "Not that it's worse than being a werewolf or anything, but I just don't think that they could take me being any more of a freak than I already am."

"You're not a freak." Snape frowned very sternly.

"Yes I am." He looked at Snape dead in the eye. "Anyone who turns into a wolf once a month is by definition a freak."

Snape didn't look amused. "Then I guess I'm a freak too."

"Yup. That's us, just a couple of freaky gay guys." He smiled despite the fact that he was doomed to live his life out as a monster, but at least it was nice to know that he didn't have to be alone anymore. "You know, when school's over, we should move in together. Someplace near some woods or something. Someplace nice."

Snape felt the dumbest smile that had ever smiled in his life forming on his lips. Remus, his sweet and kindly Remus wanted to stay with him once they left school. They had only been together for a few weeks, hardly more than a month, but what Remus was proposing was practically marriage. Snape had been an outcast for his whole life and suddenly someone wanted him, and not just for a month, or a school term, but for a long term. Maybe even forever. "Yes," he whispered, and yanked the startled looking werewolf into a crushing kiss.


	12. Chapter 12

Christmas came and went, and Severus had his Seventeenth birthday thus making him, legally, a man. It was a small affair, just him and Remus down at the Hog's Head for a few Firewhiskeys where no one would care if they exchanged affections in public, but to Severus, it was the greatest day of his life.

After being warmed by their whiskies and the quietly affectionate hand holding and cheek kissing, the two boys made their way back to Hogwarts, still hand in hand as they had been all day.

"Do you wish it could stay like this for always?" Snape was not normally one with a disposition towards hypothetical questions, and certainly not such overly sentimental ones, but the fireshiskey had made him cheery and a bit sloppy.

"Like this?" Remus looked out at the snow covered world around them and frowned. "No, it's too cold."

He laughed, free and easy. "No, I mean this," he held up their hands, "just being happy together."

"Oh," Remus blushed and smiled, "I guess so." He hadn't really thought about having any relationship last as long as forever, or even for the rest of his life, but there was something romantic about the idea that appealed to him. "Yeah, that'd be nice."

Snape beamed beside him, practically glowing with exuberance until he realized they weren't the only ones walking back to school and Remus was still holding hands with him.

"Hey, Moony!" Came the call as Sirius Black caught up with them, rosy cheeked and grinning. But his exhilaration was short lived. "Is this your illusive boyfr- holy hell! What is that thing on your arm?" His grey eyes were a little wild in disbelief as he turned to shout over his shoulder. "James, he wasn't lying. Snivley really is his girlfriend!"

Remus stopped walking, but did not let go of Severus' hand. He knew his friends would find out eventually, but that didn't mean that he felt ready to face them.

"Piss off Black, I don't want you talking to me on my birthday." He tried to gently pull Remus away from his friends, but as Lupin held his ground, Severus wasn't going to force him.

True, Lupin was nervous about facing the situation head on, but the way he figured it, it would be better to talk this over now with Snape there to support him than later, alone with his friends in their quarters. Of course, when he saw James and Lily approaching together, also hand in hand, he wasn't so sure anymore.

"We already talked about this." Remus managed a calm tone despite how everyone else seemed to be reacting. "Please don't make this into a big deal."

"A big deal? We thought you were putting us on. You can't be dating this-this prat." Sirius was no longer shouting, but he wasn't far from it.

"Well, he is." Snape gave Remus' hand a squeeze. "I suggest you deal with it and move on with your pathetic life."

James and Lily walked up with Peter grinning beside them and Lily looking extremely uncomfortable. "Wow. I can't believe you're really snogging Snape. What on earth possessed you to do it?"

Remus sighed. "I dunno… we just kinda, got drawn in together. It just… felt right."

"That's disgusting." Sirius still couldn't accept it. "So, wait a minute, you prefer Snape… over me?"

"Every day of the week."

To this, Snape grinned.

"Merlin, you two aren't...? Tell me you aren't letting him shag you." James demanded.

Remus turned bright red at the thought. "We're not having this conversation, James." He liked his friends under normal circumstances, but this was not one of those circumstances. "I have to get back to school."

After getting over the shock of what James just said to one of his closest friends, Lily was absolutely furious. "So do I." She pried her hand away from the surprised looking James and started marching back to campus in a huff.

James stood there dumfounded, like an idiot. "Wha'd I do?"

The outraged Lily turned on her heel and glared down at him with all her strength. "How can you talk to him like that? He's your friend, he's your _very good_ friend."

"But-"

"I don't want to hear it, now you go back there and start acting like a real friend is supposed to act, or you can forget about ever going on another date with me EVER again." Then she smiled at Remus almost shyly. "I'm happy for you. Both of you, " and with that, she turned away again and continued walking back to the school alone.

Despite all else, James' dumbstruck face caused Sirius to laugh and smack his friend on the back. "She told you."

"Shut up, Black." James ran a hand through his unruly hair and looked back at boys who were still stubbornly holding hands. "Remus… why? You could do so much better, mate." Apparently an apology was not at the top of his list.

"And Lily could do a lot better than you." Remus heard himself say before he could catch it.

James was not used to being spoken to that way, and he didn't take to insults well. "Is that so? Well, have fun sleeping in the hallway from now on 'cause there's no bloody way I'm letting a Snape shaggin' poof sleep in the same room with me."

Then, before anyone knew what had happened, Remus' hand was suddenly cold and empty, Snape had somehow materialized were James was standing, and James could no longer breathe through the air pipe Snape was currently squeezing. James pulled at Severus' hand to try to get some air, but it was fruitless, and Snape didn't look like a man who intended to release his prize any time soon.

Sirius, who was not about to let his friend be beaten up by a boy like Snape, was quick to step in and take a swing. Snape staggered, but only slightly and he did not let go of James either. Very quickly his wand was out and pointed directly at Sirius who was cradling his hand as if he had hurt it.

"Try it again Black, I've got a hex I have been dying to use on you."

"That's enough! Snape, let him go. Sirius, back off." Remus was beside himself with anger, and Snape for one wasn't going to test his boyfriend's patience.

Immediately, Snape did as he was told, leaving James gasping for air at his feet. He even put away his wand, daring Sirius to try something, but even Sirius was too surprised by Lupin's demanding tone to make any sort of move against him.

Remus' face was flushed with anger. "Sirius, take James to the hospital wing, and get your hand checked while you're there."

Sirius was not used to taking orders, especially not from sweet and kind Remus Lupin, but he did as he was told. It was obvious that James was not ok and his hand was starting to bruise in a fascinatingly colorful way.

Still outraged by the whole situation, Remus started marching himself in the direction of school, hands shoved deep in his pockets. He heard Snape quietly following him, and felt him gently tug at his sleeve so that they could hold hands once more. "No, Severus." He pulled away and kept walking.

Severus fell back a ways to give Remus his space and followed him, head down, like a kicked puppy.

They marched that way all the way back to the portrait of the fat lady where Lupin mumbled the password and went inside. He looked back as the portrait swung to close, not sure if Snape was still behind him.

Of course he was, standing there despondent just barley inside the common room, glancing up solemnly through his mass of jet black hair.

Sighing deeply, Remus hugged himself. "You can't be in here." He whispered in a hushed tone. The last thing that he needed now was for the whole house to know that he was dating Snape.

"Are you all right?" Snape seemed like he wanted to say something else, but couldn't or wouldn't find the words.

"I'll be fine, I just… need some time alone." He tried to smile, but it just wasn't in him. "See ya tomorrow?"

"Yeah." He watched Remus disappear up the stairs that led to his bedroom before he stepped back out into the hall. He stood motionless in front of the fat lady who looked down at him disapprovingly until some third year Griffindors trying to get into their common room interrupted his thoughts . Snape finally moved on then, but when night fell, the little perch just outside Lupin's window was the only place he wanted to be, so there he sat among the stone gargoyles, keeping watch over him until dawn.


	13. Chapter 13

Remus remained apart from his friends, as he felt that they wanted. James had made it quite clear that he didn't want the werewolf around. And though he did not stay out of the room like requested, he did stay in his bed with the curtains drawn and eat at the far end of the table during meals.

Under other circumstances, Snape would have applauded Remus for finally ridding himself of his obviously 'no good' cohorts, but they were not the only ones that he was avoiding. As days drug on, Snape found it impossible to talk to Remus. The boy blatantly avoided him and would not return the notes passed to him.

Snape did his best not to seem to desperate or harassing, but as the days went on, Lupin was the only thing he could think about. He barely got his school work done, and the rest of his free time was spent covertly spying of the sandy haired object of his affections. All his nights were spent on Lupin's window now, staring in, hoping to get another glance of the boy.

His stalker behavior was alright for the first few nights, but one dreary evening around midnight, something unfortunate happened. Sirius Black woke up, possibly to take a piss, or maybe just to get a glass of water, but his gaze happened to catch the lurking figure clinging to their windowsill, dark, fathomless eyes peering in at the sleeping boys.

His incoherent swearing and screaming woke the others in the room, but by the time they were out of their beds and could get a look at whatever Sirius was pointing at, Snape was long gone.

"Something was there! I'm tellin' ya. It was looking right at me with its creepy black eyes. Watching us."

James looked concerned, but it was more for Sirius' mental health than anything outside their window. "There's nothing there."

"But there was. I swear. It was right there." He pointed, shaken, at the window.

Remus risked a peek out of his bed curtains, even though James was in the room and frowned. "What sort of something?"

Sirius, still shaken but no longer yelling threw himself down beside his friend (even if James cast a disapproving glance in their direction). "It was like a giant spider, with at least sixteen legs and pointy teeth." He rubbed his tired face and tried to hide a smile. "I'm scared, Moony. Can I stay in here with you tonight? We can keep each other safe."

"No." He was quiet, but firm.

James stood there, arms folded, glaring. "Sirius, I swear, if you woke us all up just for an excuse to hit on Remus, I'm going to kill you."

Peter, meanwhile, looked cautiously out the window. It was a quick peek before he screamed like a girl and jumped into Lupin's bed were there was the most protection. "Something looked at me!"

"See, see! I told you guys."

James sighed. "Oh, for the love of-" but then he saw the thing outside and stopped. Sirius had exaggerated some of the attributes of the creature, but there defiantly was something outside and it was defiantly watching them. "Merlin's beard, what is that thing?" But he was already going for his wand.

Remus took one look at the hulking creature, pitifully staring in at them, at him specifically, and he knew. He groaned and put a hand over his eyes, willing it all to just go away. "It's Severus."

"What?" James looked even more terrified at the thought, remembering back to when he woke up with Snape looming over him in his bed. "What the hell?"

Sirius stood and angrily banged on the window. "Hey looser, get out of here. People are trying to sleep."

Lupin stood. "Stop it. You wanna wake the whole tower up?" He opened the window and leaned out. "What do you want?"

Snape, slinked a bit closer. "Can we talk?"

"No."

"But- "

"I'm tired."

"But,-"

"No. Not tonight."

"Then when? It's been over a week."

"Not tonight." And Remus closed the window and returned to his bed.

"He's still out there." Peter felt a need to point out.

"I'm not sleeping in here with that freak watching us all." James had not put down his wand, but did not look like he planned to use it.

"How the hell did he even get up here?" Sirius pulled an arm protectively around Remus who was quick to push it away.

"Magic, alright?" He sighed and started trying to remove the extra boys from his bed. "Can we all just go back to sleep now?"

"Not with his looking at- oh for crying out loud," James was staring at the window in disbelief and Snape plastered his face and hands against the glass, "that's just pathetic."

Lupin just growled and curled up in his invaded bed and did his best to ignore Sirius as he poked at him.

"Make him amscray." Sirius just wasn't comfortable with Snape watching him all night. True, he could always close his canopy, but part of him was sure that wouldn't stop Snape from looking at him.

From the other side of the window, Snape whimpered pathetically. "I'm so hungry."

"Not tonight!" He was losing his patience with all of them and threw his pillow at the window.

"… Did you two breakup?" James sounded hopeful.

"Really really?" Sirius also sounded pleased with this bit of information.

"No, we didn't. Can I please just go to bed? I have a test tomorrow." Remus sighed.

"Hey guys," Peter pointed at the now empty window, "I think he left."

James walked over to examine the area just outside more closely, then put his wand away and nodded. "Yeah, he's gone."

Sirius shook his head solemnly, "What a creeper. You date that guy?"

"Yes." Lupin just wanted to go to sleep. He was already under his covers face buried in his pillow, but nobody seemed to notice or care.

"Break up with him." James demanded gently.

"Why?" Lupin peeked out from under his pillow. "Why does it matter to you guys who I date? Can't you just let me go to sleep and in the morning just let me date who I want?"

"But… it's Snape." Sirius bemoaned, as if that was all the reason in the world.

"Yeah, it's creepy. He's creepy." Peter nodded in agreement.

"Date someone else." James joined the other boys on Remus' bed. "Any one else."

".SNAPE. I don't see how it's any of your business who I'm with anyway. I'm gonna stay with him and that's all there is to it. And you know what else? When schools over, I'm gonna move in with him, and we're gonna have sex, and it's gonna be great."

The rest of the room looked slightly ill.

"Alright, alright, alright, alright, alright." James was covering his ears in case Remus felt like going into anymore details. "Date him then if it means so bloody much to you. I don't care anymore as long as he doesn't come back to our window, and you promise NEVER to mention doing anything sex related with him ever again."

Remus blinked in surprise. Just like that, James had caved. He did his best not to smile, because he didn't think that he should let them know how smug he was at winning. If all he had had to do was mention sex and Snape in the same sentence, he would have done it weeks ago. He tried a deep sigh, and attempted to look board. "Fine. Can I please go to bed now?"

"No, go tell him not to come round here right now. I don't want him peeking his ugly mug back in our window tonight." James threw himself back into his own bed. " 'S gunna give me nightmares." He mumbled into his pillow.

Remus looked at the other boys still sitting on his bed and had a far more genuine sigh to give them. Even if it was the middle of the night, there was no way that they were going to let him sleep as long as Snape could still be lurking outside their window.

Remus rolled his eyes, then rolled out of bed and pulled out the map, but no matter where he looked, Severus Snape did not appear on it. "He's gone."

"What do you mean he's gone." Sirius pulled the map further onto his own lap, but after fifteen minutes of searching, he couldn't find him either. "He's gone."

"That's what I said." Remus took the map back, more concerned now as Snape had said that he was hungry, knowing full well he should have let Snape eat a few days ago. "Something isn't right. He can't have just disappeared."

"Hey, as long as he aint here, I don't care where your 'boyfriend' got off to." James turned out the light, as if to tell them all to go to sleep.

Minutes ago, it was all Remus could have wanted, but he was worried now. He pulled on some clothes and stole Sirius' heavy winter coat. "I'll be back." That said, he tucked the map into his pocket and left. He didn't know where to look, but that wouldn't stop him from looking. He wandered the halls, then outside, sniffing the air and frowning into the night until he found the faintest of foot prints leading out towards Hogsmead. He prayed that they weren't Snape's because if the boy was somewhere eating someone, and anyone found out, he would be turned over to the Ministry.

Remus ran, ran until he could hardly breathe, but he kept going. Hoping that he wouldn't be too late.


	14. Chapter 14

Lupin woke up warm and comfortable with the previous night left in somewhat of a haze. He remembered chasing after Snape and he remembered stopping to rest along the path, but that was all. From the look of things, he was back in his bed, but he had no idea how had he gotten there.

He looked around, and almost yelled out when he found Snape fast asleep beside him with bits of wood and glass stuck in his clothes and hair. It was a wonder Remus hadn't cut himself sometime in the night.

"Hey, Sev," he whispered, and shook him gently, but the boy was out. Remus figured he must have fallen asleep on his way to Hogsmead and Snape must have brought him back to his room.

Remus sat up and began carefully picking out the bits of glass, making a pile on his nightstand, but when Snape still did not stir, Remus started to worry. He gently patted the boy's shoulder, then cheek, but still nothing. "Hey," he tried a bit louder. Out of concern, he felt around his boyfriend's throat and was horrified to feel no pulse. But was that normal for a vampire, or a halfvampire? He had no idea as he tried to avoid the subject of dark creatures as they always hit a little too close to home.

In a moment of madness, Remus pulled open the trunk at the foot of his bed and retrieved his little knife used to cut potion ingredients. He did not know any numbing spells, so he braced himself for the pain. It was a little cut, and in the scheme of things, far less painful than his transformations once a month. Then he pressed his slightly bleeding wrist to Severus' lips and hoped that it would do something.

Even though he wanted Severus to start eating, he was honestly terrified when Snape's black eyes snapped open and he leached onto his arm, biting down hard enough to take a chunk of flesh out of his arm if he had wanted to. The pain was terrible and Lupin cried out despite his best efforts not to.

It was only seconds before his friends leapt out of their beds and saw what was going on. Sirius and James immediately went for their wands, but Lupin protectively curled around Snape's head as he continued to feed. "Don't! He just needs to eat!"

"He's eating your arm!" Sirius pointed out in a sensibly loud fashion.

"It's fine!" Remus found himself to be yelling back in response.

A lot more yelling followed, butRemus could not remember all that was said. He was getting dizzy, his head was feeling light and his stomach started to feel like it might turn inside out. He could ever so faintly recall starting to fall over and seeing his friends rushing to him, but then there was nothing.

When he woke up again he found himself in the infirmary surrounded by his concerned friends. In the distance he saw Dumbledore and Mme. Pomphry discussing, or rather quietly arguing, about something he couldn't quite make out.

Once James noticed Lupin was awake, he smiled. "Hey champ, how you feeling?"

"Ok, I guess…where's Snape?"

James frowned and looked away again.

It was Sirius who caved and answered Lupin's question first. "He rushed you here as soon as he realized he'd taken too much. He was a lot faster than we were, so by the time we all caught up he already had you attached to some of Pomphry's blood potions. He actually took really good care of you until Pomphry saw us and took over. After that, Dumbledore took him away. We don't know where he is now, but were pretty sure Dumbledore's got him stashed somewhere."

Remus, although he was still dizzy and ill feeling knew he had to go talk to Dumbledore. He pushed his blankets away and tried to sit up.

"Hey, now." James gently pushed him back down. "Where you off to in such a hurry?"

"Dumbledore, he said- he said that Snape would get his wand taken away." He struggled against his friend's gentle hand but had to give up, he was so weak.

"They could only do that if he was a full vampire or if he killed somebody."

The others looked at Peter in surprise, Sirius especially. "How do you know that?"

"I read up on it… just in case."

James laughed "In case of what?"

"There are vampires in the forest… I was worried about getting bit."

"And for good reason." Lupin tried to relax, but Dumbledore's agitation with Slughorn coming into the room now was very distressing. "That's where Sev got bit. He told me." He sighed. He was tired, but he wasn't willing to go back to sleep until he knew what was going on with Snape.

"Want me to go find him, Moony… make sure he's all right and all?" James offered in an uncharacteristically kind manner.

Remus frowned up at his friend who was still gently holding his shoulder down. "Why?"

"It would make ya feel better." He shrugged it off indifferently as if it were perfectly normal for him to be kind to every living thing, especially Lupins and Snapes.

"You hate him." Remus pointed out, not trusting his friend in the slightest.

James shrugged again. "But you're my mate." He pointed out. "Sirius you stay, make sure he doesn't do anything stupid. Come on Peter, let's go find his girlfriend." And the two left leaving Remus feeling a little loved and a lot concerned.

Sirius sat down on the edge of Lupin's bed, looking like a worried mother. "So, you didn't tell me you had a thing for getting bit. I guess a blood sucker for a boyfriend makes sense then, but you still should have been more careful."

Remus smiled a little. "Yeah I guess."

"Mr. Black, I think it's time you were off. I can't let you miss all your classes now."

Sirius frowned at Dumbledore, but nodded, bid his buddy goodbye, and hesitantly walked out of the hospital wing with a huffing, insulted looking Slughorn and a fuming Mme. Pomphry.

Lupin watched his friend and the others go, feeling as if his last means of support and protection had left him. But he would be ok, he would have to be. Forcing himself up to a sitting position he looked up at Dumbledore. "Is Severus all right?"

"He is fine, which is more than can be said for you, Mr. Lupin. What you did was incredibly dangerous."

Lupin looked down. "I didn't know he would need that much."

Dumbledore, for the first time, looked down at Lupin with grave disappointment. "How could you have been so foolish? He might have killed you."

"No, he wouldn't have."

"There's no way you could have known that."

"He's never taken that much before." But Lupin's defense seemed only have made matters worse and he knew it by the look of shock on the old man's face. "He stopped and I'm fine." Remus said hurriedly.

"The only reason he stopped is because your friend pulled him off of you." Dumbledore seemed determined to get it through to Remus what a horrific situation he had put himself in.

"He would have stopped on his own." The boy replied stubbornly.

Dumbledore ran his hands over his beard and mumbled to himself before speaking to Remus again. "How many times has he fed successfully from you that you feel so confident? How many times have you put your life on the line for this boy?"

Lupin looked away, almost ashamed to admit it. "I didn't keep track…. Maybe every other week since the first time… " He just couldn't believe Snape could have ever hurt him on purpose. "But he's never gone that far, not once in all that time. I don't know what happened."

"If your friend had not pulled young Snape off of you, you would have died. What you did was beyond foolish and I feel it imperative to tell you that I expected better judgment on your part."

"He didn't do it on purpose. He wouldn't hurt me on purpose." Remus realized that he was almost shouting at the old headmaster and felt a bit ashamed. "So... he just- he wouldn't. It was an accident."

"And how can you be so sure?"

Lupin didn't really know what to say to make the headmaster understand. "He takes care of me. He… cares about me. He wouldn't hurt me… not on purpose." He sighed. "It's my fault anyway. If I hadn't of been so mad at him and refused to let him eat for so long, none of this would have ever happened."

"I see." He leaned over, peering at him over his half-moon glasses. "Did he bit you by force tonight then, or did you let him."

"I let him, I wanted him to. He needed the blood."

"You are aware that he is getting blood supplements brought to him. He wasn't starving."

"He says they don't taste good." Remus lay back on the fluffy pillows, still feeling weak. "It's not a big deal, Headmaster. He won't do it again."

"And you are sure of this?" Dumbledore still seemed quite skeptical.

"Positive, Sir."

"And how can you be so positive?" The old man was just being difficult, smiling even, as if he was enjoying torturing Remus by interrogating him. Why wouldn't he just believe that Remus knew?

"Because, Sir." He felt frustrated at the whole thing. "Because… because he loves me." Remus had no idea if it was true or not, and normally he was very against lying to teachers, but it could be true. Part of him wanted it to be true.

Dumbledore smiled more openly then, one of his usual twinkly eyed smiles, and winked at him. "That… is what I was waiting to hear." He patted Remus on the leg and sauntered amusedly out of the room, humming some jaunty tune, and leaving Lupin behind feeling more concerned and more confused than ever.


	15. Chapter 15

AN: Welp, this is it. Hope you enjoyed the story, but although his one is over, don't worry! Me and my beta alerady have another project in the works. :)

See you then!

* * *

><p>After that things evened out for a while. Remus was let out of the hospital and allowed to return to his room and to his surprise, his boyfriend. Snape seemed just as shocked about it as Remus was, but neither of them complained. Dumbledore did pull them aside and give a lecture on being safer and more coconscious of their fluids.<p>

Needless to say both boys left that meeting feeling unusual and slightly disturbed.

It wasn't until near the end of the school year that Remus found out from Dumbledore that Snape had told him that he loved Remus the same night Lupin had nearly died. The crafty old headmaster apparently just wanted to have Snape's self-preserving confession of love collaborated by Remus before he let him go. Remus was a little annoyed at the old man's manipulative nature, but was more thrilled than anything to know that Snape really did love him.

Remus was not sure how to tell Snape that he felt the same. He couldn't just say it, because Snape still hadn't told him. So instead he got together whatever money he could and made plans.

He came to Snape the night after they finished their OWLS, in their regular meeting place and slipped a hand in his pocket. The shared a smile and a short kiss. "I've done something a bit rash, I hope you can be forgiving." Remus whispered softly.

"That all depends I suppose." Snape smiled and pulled an arm around the werewolf's small frame.

"I've rented a flat for us in Devonshire."

Thought he was surprised, he also couldn't have been happier. He kissed him sweetly and held him close. "Is it a nice place?"

Lupin smiled. "Well, it's a small place, cozy. Bedroom, living room, open kitchen… and the back opens up to a great big open area with a dirt trail leading into the woods."

"Sounds wonderful, when can we move in?"

Lupin shrugged peacefully. "When we're all done here I suppose."

"We should just leave tonight." Snape's eyes glinted with mischief that seemed rightly out of place.

"We haven't even had the end of the year feast."

"We can come back for that. Is it attached to the flue network?"

"Well yeah, but… could we?"

"O'course! I'm sure Slughorn won't mind us popping in and using his fireplace. Especially if he isn't there at the time."

Lupin laughed and squeezed Snape tightly, "Alright, let's do it, but we need to be back here in the morning. Last thing I want is to spend my last few days at Hogwarts locked up in detention."

"Well, let's go." Snape started to gently pull Remus with him towards Slughorn's office.

"Shouldn't we pack something to sleep in and clothes for tomorrow?"

"We can just wear the same uniforms tomorrow." Snape assured him, still smiling ever so slightly.

"What about pajamas?" Remus, although pleased to be doing something spontaneous, was a little nervous.

"I don't think we will be needing them."

It was only then that he understood Snape's strange smile. He loved Severus, at least he was pretty sure he did having never been in love before, and although he had planned on eventually sleeping with his roommate (as there was only one room) he was still overcome with nerves at the thought of doing it tonight. "But… you mean… " His blush was terrible, but instead of backing out like his head was telling him to do, he listened to his heart and went with Snape without saying another word.

It was an awkward sort of first night together, just like how their first kisses had been. But much like the kisses, it did not take long for them to figure out what to do. And also like the kisses, it was wondrous even if somewhat moist.

The next week at school was somewhat of a blur. Tests were over, the academic year was over, their Hogwarts lives were coming to an end, and every moment of free time lazing about the castle became somehow memorable and important. Friends said goodbye for possibly the last time while others made plans to go off together on the traditional graduation world tour or to meet up again at their universities.

Remus enjoyed the last few bittersweet days with his mates. For them it wouldn't be a real goodbye, they had plans to see each other over the summer and James had plans of marrying Lily that winter (though he had not told her yet) and had promised his friends that they were all invited. Peter seemed distant, though for many years he had never seemed wholly there, so it was not much of a change. Sirius was in good spirits, much to everyone's dismay, because it meant unwelcomed hugs and almost violent pats on the back and for Remus a stolen kiss. Being in a benevolent mood, the werewolf did not jinx his friend, but let him off with a warning and a tight hug.

For the most part, Severus avoided the other Slytherins during those final few days. He knew what their plans were after graduating. Of course, they had been his plans too earlier in the year, but he knew Remus would never forgive him for becoming a Death Eater now, and if he was completely honest with himself, he never really agreed with all the same ideals the Dark Lord seemed to support in the first place. Still, taking the Dark Mark seemed to be expected of him, and the more he shirked it off, the more aggressive the others became until finally Snape came up with a half-truth to get them off his back.

He didn't think the Dark Lord would want a gay man with a werewolf for a lover in his ranks, and since that sort of thing was highly frowned upon by pureblood society, his old associated left him pretty much alone after that. A part of him regretted loosing the opportunity to be part of something frightening and powerful, but for Remus, the sacrifice was well worth making.

()()()

Years.

Years of love, and fear, and anguish followed those sweet first months of total happiness. James and Lily Potter had died, so had little Peter, and Sirius… Sirius had betrayed them all. In the short time that peace returned to the streets of England, all Severus and Remus had were each other to give them the strength to keep going. Then there was the Potter's son to worry about and protect and Severus took the job of Potions Master for the old alma mater to keep a closer eye on the boy, and with any luck, keep him out of trouble.

When Sirius was proven innocent during Harry's third year, Remus was beside himself with momentary happiness, and with Severus' help, the rat was turned in to the proper authorities and Sirius Black was once again a free man and a dear friend.

()()()

More years passed, and the war was finally over. Again. Many had lost their lives to the Dark Lord and his followers, including the last remaining Marauders: Lupin, Black, and their newest member, Severus Snape. But, although they died in battle, their memories lived on in the hearts of those they left behind.

Harry never forgot his Godfather or the other men he had come to depend on in his early life, and when it came time that he too passed from the halls of Hogwarts and began a family of his own, he made sure the names of his fallen heroes would carry on in the lives of his sons:

James Sirius, and Remus Severus Potter.

Fin


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